Friday, April 20, 2007

If I was crippled...

(Best if read with a mind prone to mental images)

I was walking across campus the other day and my mind was wondering like usual. I try not to keep my mind on a leash and many times it wanders, often to people's offices and messes up their paperwork. The topic of the day was "If i was crippled" and by crippled, i mean no use of the legs. So if I was crippled, I'd probably kill myself. No, i wouldn't be so depressed that i couldn't play soccer or go biking that I'd take my own life, I mean I'd kill myself because I'd just HAVE to get a kick-ass wheel chair. So if I was permanently in a wheel chair, I'd be tearing around the place, popping wheelies everywhere, going down stairs, and taking it off jumps. The most used to the wheel chair i got, the more dangerous stuff i would do. So eventually, I'd either become more crippled or I'd probably get in some awful accident after being pulled by a car up to 35 mph from a tow rope pretending I'm "water skiing".
The only kind of crippled that would totally suck would be if I was paralyzed from the neck down. Even if I couldn't use my arms to push a wheel chair around, I'd still get one of those electric ones. I'd juice it up and take it out to the track. It might also be fun to act retard, then run over people's feet. Maybe even modify it with a full foam bumper so that I could fall asleep at the wheel and careen into walls.

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Exploring Pop-ups

I have this game i play sometime when i'm really bored. I mean REALLY bored. It's where you go to your homepage and click on the first ad or popup that you see. On the next page you go to, do the same thing. You either keep doing this or you stop after 5 pages. Well, today, it ended up taking me to this poster which made me chuckle.

Morning Brew

Yay! I have coffee!

Thursday, April 12, 2007

Easter Snow!

It's hard to see, but there's 1.5 feet of snow below that sign.

Method for pissing off your brain

As a college student, i get far to little sleep. I have developed a 12 step program to be able to stay up late and get up early without feeling tired. Common side affects include but are not limited to headache, stomach aches, diarrhea, uncontrolled tremors, hyper activeness, addiction to hard drugs, gas, vomiting, stroke, heart attack, and mild bitchiness. Do not use this program if you're pregnant. May cause death in small children and pets. Safe to drive and operate small to medium machinery. See your doctor for warnings about using this method. Do not use this method often. Recommended usage is no more than once a week.

1) First off, set your alarm for about an hour before you want (or need) to get up. If you have 2 alarm clocks, set the second one for the time you want to get up.

2) Purchase some caffeine pills (NoDose etc). Some places I.D. you for getting these (Wal-Mart).

3) Before going to bed, set 1 pill out and a glass of water.

4) Go to bed.

5) When the first alarm goes off, take the pill and water.

6) Go back to sleep.

7) While you are sleeping the pill will kick in. Depending on how you are, you may wake up before the 2nd alarm goes off. For me, the alarm goes off and pretty much awake and ready to go.

8) Get up and do whatever the hell it is that you're up early to do.

9) There really is no step nine so you can put whatever you want in here.

10) This is simply a boost to get you and start your day. It does NOT replace your morning coffee.

11) If caffeine gives you a head, take some Excedrin or Tylenol.

12) Enjoy your day!

Surgeon General's Warning: This method is known to cause cancer in the state of California. If you use this method, stay the hell out of California.

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

So it seems this "Blogging" thing isn't making me any money

Don't be fooled by the title of this post. I'm not in it for the money...because there isn't any. This post isn't really about making money though. It's about my ridiculous pre-req quiz for Vibrations. Below is just FINDING the equations to solve the problem. I didn't have to actually solve them.